Rage is a funny thing. It can be released by many ways: violence, alcoholism, compulsive eating, swearing, vandalism, or defecating in public. I’ve done pretty much all of these in my 33 years following some legendary blunders by my various sports teams. (I’ll let you figure out which one is still not checked off of my “life list.”)
But, with a new baby girl(?) on the way and with no end to my love of sports in sight, I needed a new one less likely to cause “My daddy used to lose his fucking shit on Sunday afternoons and now I strip for meth.” to appear in a future deposition.
So, I bring you MikesRage.com. When my sports teams play, you’ll see real-time updates of my inevitable rage, even posted live from my iPhone when I’m at a game.
But, please indulge me as I bring you one post-game rage stroke caused by the Maryland Terrapins:
Grievous Vasquez. That should be the correct spelling of that asshole’s name. Seriously, has any whore of a mother ever named a kid with a more appropriate fucking name? She was probably too illiterate or bloated with horse cum to spell it correctly, but I know what she meant. What a fucking useless prick. Who the fuck talks shit when losing to William and Fairy at home? Grievous does, that’s who.
First off, for those of you who say, “But he averages 20+ points a game? I mean he scored 26 didn’t he?,” well I have a rebuttal: eat my shit. This is the same leaking douchebag who said that Cameron Indoor Stadium was “his house” and then went on to lose by 40 points. Getting trounced by 40 is probably like his house, because if I was the father to this utter failure I’d be getting trounced by 40 oz malt liquor bottles.
And if you think I hate Vasquez, then you have no idea how much I loathe Millborne, who from this point forward will be called Landon Stillborn, because that is what he should have been. I have never seen a Maryland player exhibit worse defense (outside of our football team). When he finally makes a basket without travelling or shooting a brick, he pounds his chest at the opponents. Too bad the game was already out of hand with less then 3 minutes to go. Nice job facialbait.
Landon Stillborn Shouldn't Celebrate After Useless Dunks
This season is already over. Losing to William and Mary. As bad as losing to American at home? No, but it still suck me long time.
The rage continues…
Mike's Sports Rage 